“Use your loaf, mate. Get up them apples and have a butcher’s out the window.”
If that sentence made absolutely no sense to you, congratulations – you’ve just encountered Cockney rhyming slang, one of the most delightfully baffling linguistic inventions in the English language.
Born in the East End of London in the mid-19th century, Cockney rhyming slang replaces common words with phrases that rhyme with them – and then, just to make things even more confusing, often drops the rhyming word entirely. It’s a linguistic puzzle, a cultural artifact, and a source of endless confusion for visitors to London.
How Cockney Rhyming Slang Works
The basic principle is simple: take a word, find a phrase that rhymes with it, and use that phrase instead.
For example:
- Stairs rhymes with “apples and pears”
- So “stairs” becomes “apples and pears”
- But then Cockneys often drop the rhyming part, so “stairs” becomes just “apples”
This is why a Londoner might tell you to go “up the apples” and expect you to understand they mean the stairs.
The translation of that opening sentence? “Use your head, friend. Go up the stairs and have a look out the window.”
The Origins: A Criminal Code?
The origins of Cockney rhyming slang are debated, but the most popular theory suggests it developed among market traders, street sellers, and yes, criminals in London’s East End during the 1840s.
The idea was to create a coded language that outsiders – particularly the police – couldn’t understand. If two traders wanted to discuss prices without customers knowing, or if less legitimate businessmen wanted to talk without the law catching on, rhyming slang provided the perfect cover.
The “Cockney” designation comes from a specific London identity. Traditionally, a true Cockney was someone born within earshot of the Bow Bells – the bells of St Mary-le-Bow church in Cheapside. This covers a relatively small area of East London, though the dialect and slang spread much further.
Essential Cockney Rhyming Slang
Here’s your starter dictionary for understanding (and perhaps using) this peculiar linguistic tradition.
Body Parts
Barnet (Barnet Fair) = Hair
Example: “Nice barnet, mate. New haircut?”
Boat (Boat Race) = Face
Example: “Look at the boat on him!”
Mince Pies = Eyes
Example: “She’s got lovely mince pies.”
North and South = Mouth
Example: “Shut your north and south!”
Plates (Plates of Meat) = Feet
Example: “My plates are killing me after all that walking.”
Hampsteads (Hampstead Heath) = Teeth
Example: “Have you seen his Hampsteads? He needs a dentist.”
Todd (Todd Sloan, or on your tod) = Alone
Example: “I’m on my todd tonight.”
Loaf (Loaf of Bread) = Head
Example: “Use your loaf!”
People and Relationships
Trouble (Trouble and Strife) = Wife
Example: “I’d better get home to the trouble.”
China (China Plate) = Mate (friend)
Example: “Alright, me old china?”
Berk (Berkshire Hunt) = Well, a rude word for a foolish person
Example: “Don’t be such a berk.” (Often used without awareness of its origin)
Porkies (Porky Pies) = Lies
Example: “Don’t tell porkies!”
Tea Leaf = Thief
Example: “Some tea leaf nicked my wallet.”
Dustbin (Dustbin Lid) = Kid
Example: “How are the dustbins doing at school?”
Money
Bread (Bread and Honey) = Money
Example: “I haven’t got much bread this month.”
Dosh (possibly from “doss house”) = Money
Example: “Have you got any dosh?”
Archer (Jeffrey Archer) = Two thousand pounds
(Named after the amount the novelist allegedly paid to a sex worker – this is newer slang)
Pony = £25
Ton = £100
Monkey = £500
Grand = £1,000
(These aren’t strictly rhyming slang but are part of Cockney money vocabulary)
Everyday Words
Dog (Dog and Bone) = Phone
Example: “Get on the dog and call your mum.”
Butcher’s (Butcher’s Hook) = Look
Example: “Have a butcher’s at this!”
Barney (Barney Rubble) = Trouble
Example: “There was a right barney at the pub last night.”
Bees (Bees and Honey) = Money
Example: “Have you got any bees on you?”
Brahms (Brahms and Liszt) = Drunk (pissed)
Example: “He was absolutely Brahms last night.”
Cobblers (Cobbler’s Awls) = A vulgar word for nonsense
Example: “That’s a load of cobblers!”
Giraffe (Giraffe/Laugh) = Laugh
Example: “You’re having a giraffe!” (You must be joking)
Khyber (Khyber Pass) = A vulgar word for backside
Example: “Stick it up your Khyber!”
Ruby (Ruby Murray) = Curry
Example: “Fancy a ruby tonight?”
Rosie (Rosie Lee) = Tea
Example: “Put the kettle on for a Rosie.”
Syrup (Syrup of Fig) = Wig
Example: “That’s definitely a syrup he’s wearing.”
Titfer (Tit for Tat) = Hat
Example: “Nice titfer, where’d you get it?”
Actions
Rabbit (Rabbit and Pork) = Talk
Example: “She can rabbit for hours.”
Scarper (Scapa Flow) = Go (flee)
Example: “The police arrived and everyone scarpered.”
Bottle (Bottle and Glass) = A vulgar word for courage/nerve
Example: “Have you got the bottle to do it?”
Places and Transport
Jam Jar = Car
Example: “I’ll pick you up in the jam jar.”
Battle Cruiser = Boozer (pub)
Example: “See you down the battle cruiser later.”
Rub-a-Dub = Pub
Example: “Fancy a pint at the rub-a-dub?”
Modern Cockney Rhyming Slang
The tradition continues to evolve. Modern additions include:
Ayrton (Ayrton Senna) = Tenner (£10)
Named after the Formula 1 driver.
Britney (Britney Spears) = Beers
Example: “Fancy a few Britneys?”
Calvin (Calvin Klein) = Fine
Example: “Everything’s Calvin.”
Nelson (Nelson Mandela) = Stella (Artois beer)
Example: “I’ll have a pint of Nelson.”
Ronan (Ronan Keating) = Meeting
Example: “Can’t talk now, I’ve got a Ronan.”
Tony (Tony Blair) = Hair
Example: “She’s just had her Tony done.”
Cockney Rhyming Slang in Popular Culture
You’ve probably encountered Cockney rhyming slang without realizing it. Words like “berk” and “cobblers” are used throughout Britain by people who have no idea of their origins. “Having a giraffe” and “telling porkies” have spread far beyond East London.
British films and TV shows frequently feature Cockney characters using the slang:
Is Cockney Rhyming Slang Still Used?
Yes and no. The traditional East End community that created and maintained rhyming slang has largely dispersed. Gentrification, the Blitz during World War II, and population movement to the suburbs have transformed the old Cockney heartland.
However, certain terms have become embedded in everyday British English. Most Brits know what “having a butcher’s” means, even if they’ve never been to the East End. “Telling porkies” is universally understood.
Meanwhile, new rhyming slang continues to be created, particularly among market traders and in certain subcultures. It remains a living tradition, even if it’s no longer the dominant dialect of any particular area.
Some linguists argue that Multicultural London English (MLE) – the dialect of young, diverse London – is the true successor to Cockney, though it has different characteristics and vocabulary.
Tips for American Visitors
- Don’t try too hard. Using rhyming slang if you’re not from London will sound forced and possibly mockable. But understanding it? That’s genuinely useful.
A Final Word
Cockney rhyming slang represents something wonderful about language: its playfulness, its creativity, and its use as cultural identity marker. It emerged from working-class communities who created their own code, their own in-group language that defined belonging.
Even as the original communities have changed, the slang endures – a reminder that language is alive, constantly evolving, and endlessly inventive. Whether you’re heading down the rub-a-dub for a few Britneys or just having a butcher’s at London life, knowing a bit of rhyming slang helps you appreciate one of the city’s most distinctive traditions.
Just don’t be a berk about it.
Have you encountered Cockney rhyming slang in your travels? Which terms puzzled you most? Share in the comments!
